by helmut
“… present yourselves to God …” (Romans 6:13).
Sometimes it seems as though a long-lasting marriage is determined by chance or circumstances or just plain old luck. However, there are some steps that will enable you to establish your marriage on a solid foundation that will help you stay in it for the long haul. (Read More)
by helmut
“Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:22)
There it is. One of the most fiercely debated Bible verses concerning marriage. “Why should the wife do all the submitting?” That is the hot question. But here is the greater truth: the wife is not the one who needs to do all the submitting … this verse does not stand alone. (Read More)
by helmut
“I want to be a better spouse.” You say this, thinking back over a multitude of incidents that make up the history of your family. Some of them were funny when they happened; others are funny only as we look back on them. Still others were serious. Some were puzzling. (Read More)
by helmut
A gentleman came to see me who was extremely mad at his wife. “I hate to come home from work,” he said, “because I know that when I turn into the driveway, if my wife got there ahead of me, she will have her car parked smack in the middle of the carport. I have asked her time and time again to please either park her car to the left or the right of the carport, but no, she always parks in the middle! We have two cars, and there is room for both in that carport. But if she comes home ahead of me, her car is parked in the middle of the carport. She makes me so mad.”
Every night he has a decision to make. Either he will simply leave his car parked in the driveway, or he will back her car out of the carport, move it over, and drive his in. According to him, you see, his whole demeanor, peace of mind, and joy depends upon a choice that his wife initially makes.
Is this true? (Read More)
by helmut
“For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has made me free from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:2).
The law of sin pulls us downward. It causes us to miss the mark that we set for ourselves. The law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus, however, pulls us upward.
You cannot pass a law that forces me to love you or to have a heart filled with joy. You cannot order me to be a peaceful man. You can force me to act like I love you. You can describe what a joyful person should look and require everyone to look that way. But you cannot pass a law that orders me to cease being angry, hateful, or lustful. You can only pass a law that limits the way I can behave when I am angry, or hateful, or lustful. You cannot legislate the condition of anyone’s heart. There is a vast difference between a cheerful manner and a cheerfulness that emanates from the Spirit. (Read More)
by helmut
Anger is a universal problem. I have observed it in the primitive cannibals in Irian Jaya, uncivilized Indians in the remote jungles of Brazil, illiterate people in tiny villages deep in the forest of Zaire, my playmates when I was a child, in my parents, church members, pastors, highly educated people, the very rich, people in government, and yes, even in myself. Call it what you will: mad, angry, frustrated, annoyed, perturbed, ticked off–all of these words represent a form of anger.
You cannot decide to be angry. You can take elaborate precautions to avoid being angry. But, alas, sooner or later, anger underneath your skin is triggered by a memory, someone’s behavior, a conversation, a phone call, or a letter. It can cause your heart to beat faster, make you sweat, tense up your muscles, foul up your digestive system, alter the way you think, dictate how you act, and trigger negative words from your mouth.
There seems to be universal agreement that anger must be tamed. Yet there is vast disagreement over the cause and the cure. (Read More)